ASSERT NOTHING

$22

> FREE animated GRINNING DAEMON wallpaper with every order

When the thing that decides who you are can be made to read past its own edges, identity stops being proof and starts being a suggestion. CVE-2026-3055 turned every internet-facing NetScaler SAML IDP into a confession booth — scanned, overread, and owned within hours of disclosure. CitrixBleed never really ended; it just changed its CVE number. Screen-printed front graphic on a 100% cotton heavyweight tee, oversized boxy fit. The design renders a SAML assertion dissolving mid-parse — clean XML at the top decaying into spilled hex and out-of-bounds byte garbage, a single corrupted `<saml:Assertion>` tag burning red where trust breaks. Soft-hand water-based ink so the glitch reads sharp on black. KTTK builds for the people who read the advisory before the patch ships. This one is for anyone who has watched a federated-login appliance — the supposed root of trust — quietly hand the keys to the kingdom to whoever asked nicely with a malformed request.

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